Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
