so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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