Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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