first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize