It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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