Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
