so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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