ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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