Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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