Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
