yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
