is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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