Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
