also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
