I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
