Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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