ya dads aren't the best wingmen
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
