Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
