we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
