Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
