More tranny stories later!
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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