I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
