he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
