I want to stick my p in your. b.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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