Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
