I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
