You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
