OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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