hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
