just survived the first fart of the relationship.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
