her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Randomize