And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
