woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Randomize