u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Randomize
