you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
