Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
