You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
