The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
