How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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