i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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