I can tuck mytits in my pants
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
