I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
