Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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