she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
