i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
