Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
