Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
