can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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