you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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