he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
