I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I want to be your penis for a week.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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