I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
