Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize